Seriously, 2017…W.T.F. I’ve had “meh” years before, where either some unfortunate things happened, or nothing happened at all to make the year mostly forgettable. But never, and I mean never, has there been a worse year for me than 2017. I know several people who share that sentiment as well. And yet, I had some truly amazing things happen in my life this year; things that have altered my very existence and perception of life. So how do I refer to this crazy-ass year that I seem to have a love/hate relationship with? In one word (or, compound word): life-changing.
2017 has been my most life-changing year in my 31 years on earth.
It was incredible and downright terrible. I had the highest of highs and the lowest of lows. I both lost and gained people in my life. I also lost myself, and then found my true self for possibly the first time ever. Needless to say, I grew up in a major way.
But through all the hardship this year brought, an amazing thing happened…I discovered a new appreciation for my life. I learned the true meaning of friendship, love and support. I have a new path to try to navigate, but I feel a confidence now that I’ve never felt before. I mean, once you’ve been pounded into the pavement, there’s nothing else to do but get up, brush yourself off, and move forward, right?
I noticed something the other day. When I used to get depressed before, it would completely consume me and knock me down. Now it seems like every time I get depressed, I get angry about it, but in a good way (if that makes sense). I know what it’s like to be down for the count, and I don’t want to be there again. So instead of allowing myself to succumb to it for an entire day, I sit with it until I get bored of it, and then I somehow get really motivated to be productive. I honestly don’t really know where it came from, but it feels like a step in the right direction so I’m just going with it.
I have big plans for 2018, which I’ll post more about next week. I’m not one to make new year’s resolutions, but there are some things I do resolve to change in the coming year:
- I’m no longer going to dwell on the past. I will remember and acknowledge it, but the feelings that linger from my past will now be used to fuel my motivation for the present and future.
- I’m no longer going to be a people-pleaser. This doesn’t mean I’m going to start being rude, it just means that I’m done being a doormat, or someone who puts others before myself. It’s not selfish if it’s self-care.
- I’m going to use my voice and express myself more. I’m 31 years old, it’s about time I did this.
- I’m going to spend my time wisely. No more one-way friendships, no more time with negative people, and no more time wasted with people who stress me out.
- I’m going to do exactly what I want to do and I’m going to take chances. This goes for my career, relationships, social life, etc. I’m not going to cave to obligations or play it safe anymore.
To summarize, I’m resolving to take my life back and live it to its absolute fullest going forward. I now know the real meaning of “life is too short” because I’ve seen it end just like that, and it can happen to any of us. And while none of us are particularly special, we all have lessons to learn in this lifetime. We may as well try to live fulfilling lives and discover what we can about ourselves until it’s our time to go.
So peace out and F U 2017! But also, thank you.
P.S. – Thank you to everyone who’s followed my blog this year and expressed support. Whether you’ve had a good or bad 2017, I wish you success and happiness in 2018 ❤